Anxiety: when it is normal and when to seek help

Marta Vilela Guimarães · Nov 13, 2026 · 6 min read

Anxiety is not a flaw. It is an ancient alarm system, there to protect us: it speeds up the heart, sharpens attention and gets the body ready to react. Before an interview, an exam or a difficult conversation, a little anxiety even helps. The problem starts when the alarm goes off with no fire, or does not switch off once the danger has passed.

Many people live like this for years, thinking “that is just how I am” or “everyone is like this”. And it is true that everyone feels anxiety. The useful question is not whether you feel it, but how much space it takes up in your life.

How anxiety shows up

Anxiety shows up in the mind, but also, often mostly, in the body. Some common signs:

• Constant worry, thoughts going round in circles and expecting the worst.
• Muscle tension, tightness in the chest, a knot in the stomach, headaches.
• Racing heart, shortness of breath, dizziness, feeling faint.
• Trouble falling asleep, or waking in the night with your mind racing.
• Irritability, tiredness, difficulty concentrating.
• Avoiding situations, people or places out of fear of what you will feel.

A panic attack is a sudden, intense surge of these symptoms: the heart races, breathing becomes hard, and there is a certainty that something serious is happening. It is frightening, but not dangerous in itself. Still, if you have never been checked, it is worth talking to your doctor to rule out other causes.

When anxiety is no longer normal

There is no exact line, but some questions help you tell whether it is time to ask for help:

• Has the anxiety lasted for weeks or months, and not only at specific moments?
• Have you started avoiding things you used to do, like driving, going out, speaking in public or being alone?
• Is it affecting your sleep, work, studies or relationships?
• Do you find yourself turning more and more to alcohol, pills or screens to calm down?
• Do you feel you have tried everything on your own and it is not enough?

If you answered yes to one or more, it does not mean something is wrong with you. It means you deserve support.

What anxiety often hides

In a relational approach, anxiety is not only a symptom to get rid of. It is also a message. It often appears when we are carrying more than we can, when there is something we do not allow ourselves to feel, or when we repeat patterns learned early on: always having to measure up, never being allowed to fail, needing to control everything so as not to be caught off guard.

Understanding where the anxiety comes from, and what it is protecting, is often what lets it lose its grip. It is not about silencing it by force, but about no longer needing it in the same way.

What you can do now

• Notice your body. When you feel anxiety rising, slow your breathing, especially the out-breath. Breathing out slowly helps the body leave alarm mode.
• Name what you feel. Saying “I am anxious” instead of “everything is going to go wrong” creates a small space between you and the anxiety.
• Look after the basics: sleep, food, movement, less caffeine. It will not solve everything, but it helps.
• Talk to someone you trust. Anxiety grows in isolation.
• Avoid avoiding. Escaping situations brings immediate relief, but makes anxiety grow in the long run.

How therapy helps

Therapy offers two things at once. On one hand, tools to manage anxiety day to day, including mindfulness practices that help regulate the body and observe thoughts without being swept away by them. On the other, a space to understand where it comes from and what feeds it: your history, your relationships, the inner demands that are not always visible.

At Espaço Âncora we work with adults with anxiety in individual therapy, in person in Porto or online, in English or Portuguese. If your anxiety is closely tied to stress, you may also be interested in our mindfulness and stress reduction work. If this text speaks to you, a first session can be a good place to start. In a crisis or if you need immediate help, contact SNS 24 (808 24 24 24) or call 112.